Wrapping up my Kink For Couples series, this week, I want to leave you with a few thoughts.
Have patience with yourself, and your partner. Just because she doesn’t seem to hop on board the kink train, at first, doesn’t mean you can’t have some fun experimenting and seeing what fits for you. Be sensitive you are providing that safe place to explore. Supportive comments, huge rewards for steps in the right direction. Understanding and support if she decides it’s a no go. Then try something else. Remember: Safe, Sane, Consensual always.
Kink For Couples No Right Or Wrong
You may try nipple play, for example. It may not be a home run , and your experience might leave you wondering what’s wrong? Don’t all the folks you read about, see on the internet become orgasmic from it? Well, sure some do. Some people are highly aroused,by that play. Some like it as part of other play. It’s not wrong if you or your partner doesn’t see fireworks, because of it. You’re learning what works for you. There is no right or wrong and when you live those words I know you’ll be pleased with the results. Try different things, try things at least 3 times! Give yourself time to work through anything awkward or strange, allowing your mind and body to fully experience………. the experience! Then
decide to leave it as part of the play, but not the main course or ditch it all together.
Kink Doesn’t Mean D/s
I would bet that a majority of folks who hear the work kink congers up images of leather clad Dominants. Tying up, using ball gags or hoods. Spanking or nipple
clamps and other assorted delights for their impact or sensation play with their submissive.
It can be a part of YOUR kink, sure. Kink is merely an unconventional sexual taste or behavior. It is what you make it. Isn’t that beautiful? You define your kink! Don’t worry about doing “what others do”. Meaning if you want to Dominate your partner and have them submit to your sexual whims, it doesn’t mean you have to engage in sensation or impact play. Feeling that power exchange which arouses many can come in many forms. What works for you.
For those of you who are turned on by the idea of being submissive to your partner, but perhaps that partner isn’t in tune with it. Let me introduce you to a term I’ve been discussing recently. Perhaps can flesh out these ideas and have some fun with it.
It’s the idea that a male partner is a strong, confident “Alpha Male” to the world. But when it comes to his partner, his Goddess, his power and strength are used to submit to her needs and desires. The idea is: he doesn’t submit because he is weak and his vulnerability leaves him powerless. It’s because it’s something which satisfies a need in him, to serve. A gift for her, for her to use his strength, his abilities in the most humble and intimate of ways.
Often in personal conversations , my pets do know I consider their submission a gift. What are your thoughts on this? Do you think the Alphasub arrangement would be more palatable for the “masses”.
Or is worshiping your Goddess still something unmanly.
Until we chat????