Are you a virgin male? Perhaps you’ve managed to wet your willy a time or two but can’t seem to get “lucky” with the ladies as far as a long term relationship. You are constantly looking outside of yourself for reasons why you cannot achieve what you want with women. You think you need to be more “alpha” as some would drum into your head. I have therapy type sessions more often than you might think. Let’s take a look at one type of PS (phone sex) or BF (best friend) therapy I offer.

I had a couple of great extended sessions with someone who identifies with my previous statements. After some discussion regarding his challenges and goals we did a couple of role plays so I could “check out his moves” give him advice moving forward. I thought you could benefit from some of the things we handled in session.

Virgin Males What Do You Want?

Regardless if you just want to lose your virginity, or find a stable relationship you have to define WHO you want! Sure every guy’s willy springs to life when seeing those impossible beauty’s on the internet/ on tv.  The likelihood of you attracting and bedding that super model type is NIL. Keep her for fantasies. Moving on to something more important in your endeavors:  What characteristics in a lady are  you looking for?

Bratty and bitchy? Easy going and kind? Intelligent, Dominant? Whatever it is make a list. For our session he was looking for a strong dominant woman, confident sexy with a good sense of humor. Now: What does that kind of woman look for in a man? Then you develop those characteristics  needed. You already posses them,  make them paramount, Be the best you can be!

Virgin Males Alpha Doesn’t Mean Asshole

Although I find some “alpha” writings on the internet to be replete with boorish behavior, like “everything is a competition, Winning is everything” Alpha’s are “vocal and loud” you can put them aside. There are some great qualities you can aspire to. One strong attribute of  Alphas is confidence! Great!

But confidence does not equate to arrogance, like my caller. Example: The newly acquainted couple,  in our session had some talk about the neighborhood, how she loves it around “here” but  her current apartment being too far from her work she can’t enjoy it as she wished. (They met at a club / bar near where she works) His reply was, filled with a pompous “I know what you need little lady” attitude and words  something along the line of “What you need to do is…….”

STOP!

If you are looking for a strong confident woman she’s not looking to be told what she needs to do. However, with your knowledge of the area here is a fantastic opportunity to help her achieve what she wants. He happens to live down there and is aware of some fantastic apartments, not too expensive that just might be a good fit for her. See the difference? You are there to support her, provide opportunities for her to shine.

Virgin Males Stop Watching Porn

Porn is great! Porn is HOT! But PORN is not the way to to learn how to be a good lover. In our scene he quickly “tossed me on the bed” put his hand firmly around my throat. I asked him, why  he would so such things. What made him think I would like that. He agreed, he just “thought” because he “saw” it in a porn flick featuring Alpha males, and that he should be doing the same. Well, that may be all well and good, I told him: if your list included a submissive female and/or who enjoys rough play!  Males, and females alike shouldn’t ever try something “kinky” or “rough” unless you know the person well, and if you’ve talked about it before. Stop learning your “moves” through porn! Please! STOP NOW!  Each woman is different and your role with sex and everything else is to learn about her, and what pleases HER. Trust me, when she’s pleased your pleasure will follow.

Be Her Hero

Virgin Male Role

Your role is as the student. Have an open mind learning about the lady at hand. Stop focusing ON YOU, what YOU think , what YOU feel you need to be doing, and focus that energy on her. Find out how SHE feels, how SHE thinks and you’ll learn how to please her and , yes bed her. You are to listen, respond and always find ways to assist her in HER desires (sexually or otherwise) and finding ways of helping her to achieve them. Be her Hero.

Lastly :You don’t have to be 100% Alpha   to get the girl, you just have to be the best version of you, whatever that is. Know who you are looking for and find a sexy friend, like myself, you can practice those behaviors over and over until the become instinctual.

Until We Chat ????

Male Trainer Mistress Erika