There are a lot of myths about the submissive male, one being they are not “real men”. That they must have experienced some kind of trauma, or just don’t measure up to other males. Today we will look at the submissive male, and submissive male play, which are two different things.
Many people evaluate the submissive male based on his kinky activities, but as you will see the play doesn’t speak to the submissive male as a person, and why. Ready? Let’s sink into this fascinating subject!
Submissive Male Myth Not A Real Man
These types of assumptions or submissive male myths of what a real man is and isn’t are the weakest argument you can hold to. It is true, the characterization of what a man is and isn’t has evolved over time. Certainly, many of today’s modern men would not measure up to our predecessors where hunting and unalive prey was the manly measure. I don’t want to hear about the battles in the boardroom and otherwise. When you unalive a mastodon with a really long pointy stick, I’ll listen.
Therefore the value and subsequent behavior that defines a man evolves over time. It’s the wise one who opens their mind to all the definitions and measures of a real man. The continuum of man, if you will. Folly is the one who holds onto archaic thoughts with a strong grip. There are many theories regarding the processes and events revolving around extinction, and one is that the animal or plant failed to adapt. Think about it.
Other Submissive Male Myths About Power Exchange Play
What most people think of when it comes to the submissive male is that they are all pain sluts and ready to gag on, or bounce on, a big lady cock, crave chastity, and want their nipples or penis pierced and they want it all, and nothing is off limits. They are door mats to capricious power-wielding Dominatrixes. Keep reading about how wrong that is.
Submissive Male Truths
Males come in all forms and the measure of what it is to be a man is on a continuum and isn’t static. I’m sure all of you will agree, that a real man’s measure is his ability to please a Woman which is the real purpose of what it is to be a man even at our earliest times. After all, the survival of our species depends on the cock, and courting gestures to win the favor of a female and to have access to procreate, it really is the ONLY reason you are here and your first main purpose. The rest is self-preservation and activities that aid the continuation of the species.
Simply phrased, at his core the submissive male desires to please. Desires you to lead so he might have the honor of obeying. Certainly many types of guys seek out submission, from periodic play with a Dominatrix or with someone face to face, or in a relationship
When it comes to trauma processing through submission, it may or may not come into play. Considering the population of submissive males there’s a good chance some of them have experienced events with lasting impact. But not all submissive males and perhaps even most, don’t seek out submissiveness because of life’s trials and challenges. But for most, it is their expression of how they can please the Woman.
Secondly, the power exchange play myth that is heavily peppered with pain play, is just that a myth. There are many ways a submissive male may serve his Mistress. Pain play and impact play are only for some. Submissive male play is wide and varied and doesn’t necessarily involve pain or humiliation.
Submissive Male Play Vs Submissive Male
A submissive male may play with certain erotic elements, but that doesn’t necessarily speak to who they are. Simply because a male might be submissive in a relationship, doesn’t mean he engages in intimate play that borders on Kink or BDSM. Some submissive males who call me, just desire to enjoy the company and energy of a Dominate Woman. Something about our rapport calms and centers them. Taking them away from their everyday world for a while.
The scene of a collared, on all fours, begging and being flogged is the sensational hard-hitting or “money shot” for lack of a better term. Many submissive males are open-minded and willing to try many things when it pleases Mistress. The erotic repertoire of a submissive male mainly relies upon the dominatrixes he’s served. During negotiations, submissives have all the power to add, adjust or remove any type of play. Then armed with the safe word, regardless of play give her the gift of Your Submission.
So a submissive male might take Mistress’s girl cock, with anal play. But not orally, and never wants to fuck a real cock. We can make similar correlations with all types of kink play. Or perhaps one who enjoys a prostate massager and learns how pleasurable that play can be but doesn’t want to be fucked. Not all anal play is strap-on play. and no it doesn’t make you gay.
Even with harsh humiliation, if that’s how you play when the play is over, and the aftercare administered the play stops but the dynamic does not. He is still submissive to her but isn’t that beta loser worthy only of sucking on toes. His submission allowing her to play with her sadistic side for a while is a gift of his submission.
Lesson About Submissive Males
The underlying motivation (Submission) doesn’t necessarily correlate to the play. The play is about how the D/s couple expresses their Dominant, or submissive nature. Better said the kink elements on the table to engage with help the people involved feel more dominant or submissive. It’s the Domination or submission linked with the play that is arousing and fun. That submission is a gift you give your Dominant, and should always be revered as such. Can you think of other ways submissive male play doesn’t correlate to who the person is at their core? I’d love to hear your thoughts, sound off below, and be a part of the conversation!
I’ve never seen submissive men being a negative thing. Submission allows many cis men a type of freedom they don’t get in their every day life. I seek to cultivate that, it tends to bring out a whole other side of them. They are not weak, not lacking, just needing to be liberated by someone else taking the reins. Also, most “real” submissive men, are excellent leaders. Submissive does not equal doormat.
Succinct and to the point! Perfect Duchess! Thanks for stopping by!
Hopefully I can figure out day/time to resume calls in your feminization of me!!! I do want to be a girl!!! It’s to difficult to say no and resist-I can’t! On real life scale cabi said she’s going to pick out 3 new spring dresses for me to try/buy and wear on shopping trip with her along with wearing her old bra/breast forms/panties/slip/heels/wig with trip to makeup counter to put makeup lipstick and perfume on me.
We had talk about this and she said it’s time to have this done to me by her. I can’t wait for her to do this! I’m definitely her sissy girl And that’s best thing to happen for me
Yay! Sounds fantastic!
Submission in any form takes strength, when it is freely given. To allow another to determine your actions can take emotional, mental, and sometimes physical strength. To have the will to serve. Personally, I take pleasure in that. The perfect storm is when my Mistresses’ desires match my craving. For example, Mistress wants to spank me, make me flinch, see a reddened ass. I love it, and embrace it. Mistress is pleased, I am delighted. Next, she wants to deliver swats to my balls, to make flinch more. I steel myself, take pride in having the will to endure. Mistress is pleased, amused, aroused…I am delighted.
When you have no control, no power to resist there is no, no say the need for strength is only to try to resist. Once you accept submission, you can give it.
Beautifully said WS, thank you for your comment! You are right it takes strength to submit! Love this!
Very interesting Goddess Erika,🧎♂️🧎♂️🧎♂️ Though this has me wondering if i am just a loser and not a submissive or both. I have changed other the years to wear the only humiliation i love is darkroom sessions. Which i find more humiliating then verbal humiliation.
Though i wonder if i am just more of a sub beta which is why i crave dark room sessions.
Hi Slave!
You are submissive, to the nth degree. Because of your challenges, you find it more challenging to even talk with a woman, you’ve found your place serving in your way.
You please me in the one way you are actually good at.
Namely providing me with pampering and treats that reflect my status. The way you serve is absolutely the most humiliating of humiliation play!
Thank you for this. Domination and submission can take so many forms. what they all have in common, is the submissive giving up his own wants, needs or short term selfish desires in order to better serve her and trusting in her lead. It’s devotion and it is a gift. I think you are correct that it’s what men are built for. A man can find enlightenment and purpose in submission.
😘🥰🥰🥰 Thank you for stopping by “exile” , and sharing your thoughts! So true and glad you agree.
i am submissive and will probably always will be, when it come to serving Women. i feel that Women are not just Superior but it is a man’s responsibility to make sure that his Wife, Mistress, Girlfriend are protected and taken care of. Whether is sexually, or protecting Her to make sure She is happy and content.
You are fantastic Kimmy, your mindset comes through with every task and assignment! You are a delight to own! 😘
We’ll said… but then again, some submissive “males” …
Like me… tend to support the stereotypes 😉
LOL True, stereotypes are there for a reason! Thanks for stopping by prissy, your submissive words are always welcome!
Good morning mistress. Wicked awesome post. I’m submissive, and I can’t thank you enough for bringing this to me. You know my personality STOIC. I have always been that way. Then I found you, you pointed that out to me after our first session. I’ve always been shy. You and the mistresses that I’ve encountered have brought out something in me that I didn’t know was there. I love being submissive to you. You bring me somewhere special. A place that only we have. I can’t thank you enough for showing how wonderful it is to be submissive to you. I’m proud to say on your blog that I am submissive to you, and I’m proud to say that.
Good Morning Bobb! Thank you for your lovely words! I’m thrilled I could bring you to that space, that special place where nothing else matters but my voice, my control and your submission! 😘😘
Hello Erika long time.
I still read your blog, always very exciting and to the point.
I loved this.
And miss you.
B
Hi there! Glad you are still lurking and enjoying my blog! how about the weekly hot spot? Better yet, why don’t you call?
You know, no matter how long, I always welcome you back!