Submissive male types is a subject I may have talked about before, but it is such an important subject it bears repeating! Part of what I like to do on my bog, aside from having some sexy fun, is to inform and educate!

Today’s Lesson: There is no one way to be a submissive male!  Many who don’t fit into the stereotype of a “porn sub”, a  broken male, powerless and at at the behest of a capricious sadistic female, often struggle with their submissive side. They don’t identify with the submissive they see. So who are they? What are they?

This list isn’t intended to be all encompassing and even with each genre there a subsets of submission. I would love to hear from  you, what type of submissive stimulation gets your undivided attention!

Understanding Submissive Male Types

For those who are unsure or just learning about  Domination and submission (D/s) it is not a  a brain burner. Being a submissive simply means you acquiesce to the desires of another! You submit and allow yourself to be led.  See. not really complicated and not so scary! Not really that emasculating either, if you drill it down.

When you drill down the interaction of male and female, it is self evident of your intended purpose!  You were created to serve! You are hardwired to please! It is simply written in your DNA cards. You are given a very strong biological directive! That biological directive means you need access to having sex with another  In order to get that (sex), you need to impress and please them. The only thing we do with Domination (D/s) play is focusing on that directive, exploiting it for both of our pleasures.

How all the sexy exploitation plays out,  is highly subjective.  This is where it gets interesting! Finding out about you, your thoughts and desires mixing them with my experience and sense of fun, and creating a fantastic experience for us both is what I love to do! So let’s get right down, to the down and dirty!


Feel that heel digging IN!


I’m going to start off talking about erotic humiliation and submission. Being humbled, acknowledging your purpose and place resides, at some level, with most of our submissive play. Humiliation is an erotic tool. It’s not necessarily reflective of you  as a person. Humiliation arouses some just like breasts, legs or toys arouse another.  Much like other stimuli that is at my disposal, I wield that tool as needed. Humiliation is a TYPE of play, during submissive sessions not necessarily a type of submissive male. I only mention it because it’s a common thread with many submissive male types.

Keep a keen eye on the following types of submissive males, and see where you can find humiliation. Be it sensual and implied, to overt and  harsh, humiliation encompasses a vast arena.


Some might think this type of submissive is an oxymoron, a submissive male and feminization? Wouldn’t you just be a submissive female? Although the act of feminization IS a type of “Play” it warrants it’s own category as submissive male types because the feminization is how they express their submissive nature. That’s the beauty of this type of submission. We erode your masculinity, while increasing your femininity humbling you and sending you to that subspace.

A common phrase for those into feminization is they feel humbled, weak and powerless as I order them into panties, bra’s and other feminine accoutrements. Sometimes the feminization stops at panties, that is enough humbling for them. Other times, what starts out as feminization through panty play leads to a fully dressed, pampered and painted bet!

This is where the power exchange resides, with feminization play. You submit your mind and body to me, to be feminized. Often, for many, no other play is needed to get that lovely subspace. Other times, it’s just where the good times start! As my feminized submissive you please me by being my ultimate creation of your feminine self.

Pain Pets

Pain Pet

Spanky Spanky!

This submissive male type is your stereotypical submissive we see “out there” in webland. Masochistic, and pain is the way for this type of submissive.  Collared, tied sometimes with chains while a devious and delicious Mistress applies her art. You as her canvas, may receive a cane, whip or paddle. Nipples are often sensitive so toys to attach with suction cups, or clips will be utilized.

For those into CBT, a nice bound cock, with a few swats applied “just so”. Mm I just got an image of my lovely patent leather stiletto, teasingly  and tormentingly close to those oh so vulnerable testicles. The tip of the shoe bearing down on a nice set of juicy balls. Mmmm! Other included activities might include face slapping, creating artwork with a flogger on  your back.

The pain elicits natural hormonal reaction in your body, transforming that pain into pleasure. Releasing stress and pent up emotions, the submissive now has permission to express.

Erotic Submissive

Erotic Submissive Male type is an alpha and a leader in the rest of his life. But finds it an erotic respite from the stress with his submission.  His mind and body are mine to control and enjoy! He’s not submissive in any other sense of the word until it comes to his sexuality, and then only “sometimes is submissive”  The play can include all or just some of the other kinky play I talk about.  But the focus for this play is always sex and orgasm, even if it’s a tease an delay play, for a day, week or more!

Natural Submissive

Worship Mistress

What a good servant

Reserved and shy, this submissive male type truly takes pleasure with making others happy. Some also refer to this submissive male type as a service submissive.  Performing acts of service, like housework or other chores to alleviate my burdens.  Sometimes the natural submissive feels comfortable and at home being seen as a slave. His needs are not mentioned or even a concern for his owner. Rubbing her feet, drawing a bath. Paying for manicures and other pampering just to see me smile his is reward.

The Brat Submissive

A brat submissive is one who likes to push my buttons, purposely tries to draw my ire. Either before the scene by being obtuse, or a smart ass. They like when we establish rules so they can dance on that line and cross it as many times as needed to get a rise out of me.

Brat Approach

Some demonstrate an innocent coy approach, others a bit more distasteful: The “but Mistress I” brat. I don’t know if that’s a common term  but it’s the image that soars through my mind when  you put up reasons why you can’t do as I ask.  “but Mistress, I can’t do that.” Or “I couldn’t do my task…”. I take a great deal effort creating tasks for my pets, with their boundaries and field of play in mind. So I know when giving you the task that it falls well within those boundaries. To then resist by bemoaning your task, is disingenuous and immature.

Often brat play just leaves me laughing as I don’t take you seriously as a submissive. I’m a grade A smart ass and if you wanna play, let’s dance. Just be upfront and honest, tell me you are a brat! I’ll roll right along with it.

Topping From The Bottom Brat

Another brat approach is attempting to unhinge me by directing the scene.  This submissive thinks they will get “true” domination this way. They somehow think I cannot exact strict control or get the best of me/my domination without my emotions running high. The fool. Rarely does any pet draw my ire without My consent. To become upset with you, for whatever reason, lessons my control and power. Why? Well anger can affect how well you think. I’m not making this up. From psychology today:

When our thinking gets temporally impaired like these examples above, it is like we are operating with 10-15 fewer IQ points. The light goes out in the prefrontal cortex, which is our executive functioning and decision-making region of the brain.

I do not give up my power. Know that.

D/s Negotiations

You see, topping from the bottom be it brat play or not, before we play (in any way) we negotiate. This doesn’t have to take long, but it is invaluable to us both. What boundaries are in play and what is the scope of play. I’m all in when it comes to consensual play. I would never disrespect you by making you suck my dildo, if you said that is on the no fly zone. In turn, I expect you to trust me, to do as you seek: and submit. Truly submit, and ride the waves as we journey together down that rabbit hole.


You won’t regret it.

Until We Chat ????

Intelligent Phone Fantasy Mistress Erika